So, there I am, presenting a conference poster for the very first time at The Voice Foundation Symposium in Philadelphia last week. It didn’t take long for my Imposter Self to show up in this setting–literally the moment I set foot in the spaces and saw the line-up of presenters (Dr. This, PhD That, MD This, DMA That…), she announced herself Big Time. Fortunately I had the foresight to assemble a back-up team of supporters who I knew believed in me and would talk me off the ledge (thanks, Deanna and Sarah!). They fielded my panicked texts and responded with comments of “you know your stuff!”, “this conference needs your voice!”, “you’re prepared, go for it!”, helping me to centre back in myself and feel able to share from the heart what I believe and have experienced as performer and educator over many, many years.
A few notes to myself and those who encounter their own imposter selves on the regular: 1. it’s normal and acceptable to note the presence of feelings of doubt; 2. remember to stay true to yourself and not try to apologize for your approach and your work; 3. in staying true to yourself, speak as yourself and don’t get caught up in “impressing” people with language or AcademicSpeak that isn’t authentic for you; 4. you’re there to share and also to learn and grow, so be willing to listen to constructive criticism and suggestions, but also be prepared to shield yourself from unwelcome or unhelpful hostile viewpoints (I can assure you that this didn’t happen, not in the least!).
What I discovered first-hand (and what was also reinforced for me by those who were supporting me) was that there is a hungry audience out there for practical solutions and new ways of doing things. Those who are interested in what I am doing were drawn to it and engaged with excellent questions, useful suggestions for filling any gaps and just all-around inspiring and stimulating conversations.
A final note–despite my fears, I availed myself (also with both Sarah and Deanna’s encouragement: again, thanks) of free presentation coaching that was offered. What my coach (thanks, Michelle Horman) said to me in our session was that there would be many folks at this (admittedly, very science-y) conference/symposium who were educators and would be very eager for practical solutions to issues they were facing in their day-to-day work. She said that what I had to offer would be a breath of fresh air for them, and she urged me also to get directly to the meat of the presentation and explain to people how I did what I did, so that they could see themselves implementing it in their own work. This advice was among the best I received, and it helped frame every conversation I had and be open to the ideas and inputs that came my way.
It can be hard to believe you belong, especially in spaces where you feel alien. But there are always one or two others, and sometimes many more, who want to open their hearts and minds to what you have to offer. So share it with them.